Personal Highlight Of USA v England Match

I was in Chicago this past weekend to see USA v England. It was a great deal of fun. Our Minnesota contingent was big, loud, fun, and popular. What a winning combo. The true highlight for me was when we got our entire section, located directly behind England keeper Calamity James, chanting in unison while the BBC filmed us:
"We Have Dentists!"
boom boom boom-boom-boom
"We Have Dentists!"
boom boom boom-boom-boom
"We Have Dentists!"
boom boom boom-boom-boom
"We Have Dentists!"
boom boom boom-boom-boom
"We Have Dentists!"
boom boom boom-boom-boom

The Greats: Kuper & Ball

Simon Kuper on master architects Herzog & de Meuron
Crowd Pleasers
Phil Ball on the end of another Spanish futebol season
At The End Of The Day

After A Long Weekend In Chicago I Am Back With News

-The LA Times is reporting today that Thomas Rongen is being replaced by fellow Dutchman Hans Westerhoff as coach for Chivas USA. Assistant coach Zully Ledesma will helm the team until Westerhoff gets his work permits etc. Rongen will stay at the club as the "sporting director". Which just means that the club did not want to pay him his 3 guaranteed years without getting some work out of him.
-Chris Albright & Joseph Ngwenya will both be out of action for the Galaxy due to bad injuries. Albright's is a knee, and Ngwenya a hernia.
-PSV smashed Willem II 4-0 on Sunday to win the Dutch Cup. I bet DaMarcas Beasley drank a nice toast to his teammates after that one. Wilfred Bouma, Phillip Cocu, Park Ji Sung, & Jan Vennegoor of Hesselink scored.
-The man who lead Liverpool to NOTHING has been named the new coach of Frances best team, Lyon. Gerrard Houllier takes over from Jean La Page who left the team after they won their fourth staright Ligue 1 title in a row. No one still knows why La Page left. Zathras points out that my dismissle of Houllier was born out of some ignorance (go figure): "Actually, Houllier led Liverpool to a triple-trophy season, League, FA and UEFA cups."
-Diego Forlan kicked dirt directly into the face of many who dogged him, including those bores on Fox Sports Report (especially that blowhard Bobby MacMahon) by finishing La Liga as the top scorer with 26 on the season. Guys like MacMahon mocked Forlan the entire time he was playing for Man U, constantly laughing at how overrated he was. Well I guess the laughs on you fools now. Maybe it was the wrong place for Forlan to play. Or the wrong time, etc. It matters little now.
-Valencia signed Edu from Arsenal.
-DaMarcus Beasley practiced with the USA on Monday as they get ready for Costa Rica and Panaman on Saturday and next Wednesday in World Cup Qualifiers. Eddie Lewis, Eddie Grown Ass Man Johnson, John O'Brien, Pat Noonan, Cobi Jones, Oguchi Onyewu, and Frankie Hejduk were all officially added to the team as well.
-Club America pulverized Tecos 6-3 Sunday to win the MFL Clausura title. There were 105,000 in the stands cheering on the home team.
-Young Americans Frankie Simek and Danny Karbassiyoon were officialy released by Arsenal.
-Eliseo Quintanilla has asked to be released from his contract with DC United so he can find a team that will get him some playing time.
-In other DC news, they signed defender John Wilson from Rochester of the First Division.
-West Ham beat Preston 1-0 to become the third and final team promoted to the English Premier League for next season. I was pulling for Preston. Oh well.
-Celtic won the Scottish Cup. I saw a TV interview with their new coach Gordon Strachan last night. At the end of the interview, Strachan asked the interviewer, "Have you been drinkin'?" The reporter very adamently said "No!" So Strachan pointed at the camera operator and concluded, "Aye, must be this one then. I can smell the booze on the lad."
-Ronaldo kept asking Brazil to give him a rest by leaving him off the roster for the upcoming Confederations Cup. He got his wish. Kinda. He is off the team for the Confederations Cup, but he is also off the team for everything else too. That includes World Cup Qualifying. Be careful what you wish for.
-Balding freaky looking Italian referee Pierluigi Collina took charge of his last match in Serie A on Sunday. He is over the age limit for referees. Plus, he scared a lot of children.
-Marcelinho was named top player in the Bundesliga for this past season. He plays for Hertha. I love watching him play.
-Copa Libertadores launches into the Quarterfinals this week:
June 1
Atletico Paranaense v Santos FC
São Paulo v U. de N. Leon
June 2
Banfield v River Plate
Guadalajara v Boca Juniors

Rankings & Reasonings for Friday May 27

Rankings & Reasonings for Friday May 27
You get 'em a day early cuz I am heading to Chicago for USA's thumping of England. See you after that with some personal highlights.

01 New England - Win looking good. Win looking bad. Get a draw when you are outplayed. Demoralize the other teams every week. Sounds like a clear Number 1 team to me.
02 FC Dallas - I really hope the loss of Mulrooney is not to big for this squad. I really wanna see them play some wild high scoring games this year.
03 Los Angeles - No Landon, No win. Simple as that. Oh, right, then their is that pesky road-game business.
04 San Jose - See, you get rid of the old dead wood in the defense and suddenly you have 3 clean sheets in the last 4 games. Excellent team work boyoyoyoys.
05 DC United - Can Nowak handle the pressure that is starting to build? He has offense galore, but he still has the unknown defense.
06 Chicago - Still boring.
07 Kansas City - Lookin better. Those defenders are starting to cause gas for opposing coaches.
08 Real Salt Lake - Well this is my United States of.....Whatever.
09 Metrostars - "Jeff Parke. Paging Jeff Parke. Please pick up the nearest white courtesy phone. We have last season on the line, and it wants to know if you are an imposter."
10 Columbus - Now Razov is not even playing. This is a hell of a team. Rumor has it that someone is getting cut loose to make room for Chris Henderson. Please don't let it be Manuel Lagos.
11 Colorado - Did you see where Mark Chung ripped 'em as he walked out the door and headed to San Jose where he comes on and contributes to the TEAM immediately!!!
12 Chivas USA - The team stinks, the coach stinks, the fans stink. Their only win was on a dodgy PK. And they actually seem to be getting worse instead of better.

Tiddly Winks & Newsly Dinks

-PSV midfielder Johann Vogel signed a deal to play next year for Milan.
-Olympiakos are your 2005 Greek League champions.
-You already know about Liverpool. I thought it was a fairly brutal game to watch. The Pool stunk in the first half and most of the second half. Milan were amazing for the entire first 45 minutes, continued that way for the first 10 minutes of the second half, then stunk the place up for about 20 minutes, and were stuck in neutral until the end. I hate PK's to decide a winner too. But ya gotta say it loud: Hail Liverpool! What a comeback.
-Everton signed Welsh midfielder Simon Davies who was with Tottenham.
-Saturdays German Cup final should be a good one as the top two teams in the Bundesliga have advanced to the title match. It will be champs Bayern Munchen against runners-up Schalke. I would like to wish good luck to all those goofy kraut-rockin' bastards!
-Excellent John O'Brien interview in Soccer America by Ridge Mahoney. (I have seen three or four interviews with JOB in the last week or so. I think this is the best one.)
-Stuart Downing got to hurting at practice yesterday and will not play against for England the USA. Sol Campbell will be the England Captain. I would assume that Landycakes will be the USA Captain. Do you think Sol could pick Landy out of a lineup? Yeah, yer right, I don't think he could either.
-Our '02 hero, Brad Friedel, is going to get a contract extension from Blackburn.
-British newspaper The Guardian ran a story today mocking Chicago for having no stories in any of their newspapers on the England team. My words to The Guardian are: Our newspapers will start writing about your team when you start writing about ours. Touche, tata, & toodiloo, you Limey cretins.
-There have been a lot of rumors about DC United shipping out Dema Kovalenko. Here is what coach Peter Nowak had to say about that: "Listen to me: Dema is not going anywhere!"
-Speaking of DC, there was a pretty savage article in the last issue of the New Yorker on Freddy Adu. Seven pages of mostly negativity. Then today the Washington Post writes this scorcher on Freddy & Nowak. Ouch! The kid is fif-frickin-teen. Come on!
-Jonathan Spector is back home from Manchester and is training with the USA senior team, and preparing himself for the U20 World Championship in about a month.

More Wednesday Blab

Another really busy day for me, so here's the little I have:
-Another one of the unsung journalistic soccer heroes of American newspapers is Mark Zeigler of the San Diego Union-Tribune. He always has good stuff to read weekly. He has a nice bit on the MFL Championship this week.
-MLS Tonite:
Wednesday, May 25
Kansas City v Metrostars
Colorado v San Jose
Los Angeles v Columbus
-Martin O'Neill has called it a day as manager of Celtic. He is going to care for his very ill wife. That is damned honorable if you ask me. The Wee-Man of British football, Gordon Strachan, is going to take over. I feel bad for the Celtic players though, cuz Gordon never learned to take the spoonful of marmite out of his mouth and speak properly. He is funny pretty though.

See Some Excellent USA Video From Training Camp

If you go to the US Soccer website there is video of an interveiw with DaMarcus Beasley where he talks about the nasty-assed knee injury he suffered with PSV. As usual he is straight up, and hilarious. Its why we love the guy. He wants to play against England and in the Qualifiers! Lets hope the coach feels the same way. (Warning: the beginning of the video has ultra cheesy USA v England patriot gunk.) There is also footage from Mondays USA practice with a tribute to Earnie Stewart on his retirement.
I think the video footage that US Soccer puts on its web site is always a very cool inside look at the team.

Yesterday's News Today

I got a little busy yesterday and this stuff did not get posted
-So the deal for Mike Petke leaving DC United turns out to be a swap with Colorado for Chris Henderson. But Henderson is not actually headed for DC, rather Columbus who is sending someone unknown at this time to DC. I figure it must be a player from outside the league that DC is not in a place to reveal yet. Interesting! Rumor also has it that Columbus is going to release a player to make room for Henderson.
-This leaves Colorado without Chung or Henderson who have been their best players for the past couple of years. (Although that's not saying much.)
-Josh Wolff has been called into the USA lineup for Saturday beating of England. Excellent choice.
-Ronnie O'Brien of FC Dallas is the MLS Player of the Week.
-The Alpha Men by Phil Ball - Phil picks his La Liga team of the season. (Great reading as always.)

Also: I will be in downtown Minneapolis this afternoon watching the UEFA Champions League final at The Local. Milan v Liverpool starting at 1:30pm central time.

Monday Von Newsday

-Oguchi Onyewu was injured (no details available) and will be replaced on the USA squad against England by Eddie Pope. Correction: Onyewu is not injured, but his club, Standard Liege, is in the playoffs for a Belgian league spot in the UEFA Cup next year. The play home and away with Genk May 26 & May 29. He will be on hand for the USA World Cup Qualifiers on June 4 & 8.
-The other good USA news is that Cory Gibbs looks to be healthy and will report for the England match.
-As will Damarcus Beasley, who will train, but not play. (Can we hope for a miracle?!) I would guess the USA coaches will take a look to see if he can play in the Qualifiers.
-Marc Connolly interviews Johnny O'Brien for Soccernet!!
-Blackburn defender Ryan Nelson made a return trip to DC for Saturdays match and was presented with his 2004 Championship Ring. It's guys like him that show how good MLS really is.
-Clint Dempsey dislocated a finger during warmups before Saturdays match against the Mets. He was scared by it.
-A continuing knee injury has caused Earnie Stewart to decided to retire from playing. He will have a job immediately though as VVV Venlo has named him the teams Technical Director.
-Big MLS rumor this morning has Mike Petke leaving DC to sign with Colorado. Two other players are said to be a part of this move, as is a third team. Should be interesting to see how this one plays out.
-Congrats go out to Rangers who snuck in at the last minute to score the Scottish title out from under the noses of Celtic. The day started with Celtic holding a 2 point lead. Rangers beat Hibs 1-0 to keep their chances alive, but Celtic lead 1-0 late in their own match against Motherwell. Shockingly though, Celtic gave up 2 late goals to lose the game and the title!
-Congrats also to Juve who wrapped up the Italian Serie A on Friday after Milan tied 3-3 and knocked themselves out of the title race.
-Last congrats of the day to Benfica who won the Portuguese title for the first time in 11 years. Porto finished 2nd.
-The top three goal scorers in the Bundesliga this year were: Marek Mintal of crappy Nuremberg with 24 (frankly amazing considering his team!), Roy Makaay of Bayern scored 22, & Dimitar Berbatov of Leverkusen bagged 20.
-The MFL semi finals concluded with Club America beating Cruz Azul 3-1 (6-2 on aggregate) & Tecos winning the other semi by drawing with Morelia 1-1 (2-1 on aggregate). I don't know when or where the championship will be played, but I will post it as soon as I find out.
-Ruud Gullit quit as coach of Feyenoord today, but in reality he was going to be fired for finishing 4th. I think he's been a decent coach and will land with another team. How about MLS (trying to sound like Sid Hartman).
-Hernan Crespo will probably get the start in the Champions League final Wednesday for AC Milan, beating out Superpippo Inzaghi.

Masters At Work - Kuper On Maldini

Maldini finds secret of eternal youth

The Arse Did Not Deserve It......

...... but of course Man U did not go out and TAKE it either.
The most telling sign of the "cup thievery" was the look on Thierry Henry's face. He looked guilty. Even though he didn't play, he knew his team didn't deserve that big old silver cup, or the celebration that came after it.

Rankings & Reasonings for Friday May 20

Number & Why:
01 New England - The kings. Has any team ever started a MLS season this strong. What else do you want me to say?
02 FC Dallas - Now the test begins. Many road games before their new home opens in early August, and without Ruiz and Johnson for many of them. Not to mention the season long loss of Mulrooney.
03 Los Angeles - Back at home again where they feel safe and snuggley. No wonder Landon likes being there. Maybe the whole team is dating his girlfriend and they hate to leave her.
04 San Jose - They just got hammered by injuries. Weibel and Dayak out for the season, Ching and Mullen out for a month. Chung (not Ching) comes in to add something. They play at LA, not good news. Which means they will probably win big.
05 Kansas City - Here they come. You just knew the quality was going to start showing up. Lets see if they can play consistently now.
06 DC United - No reason for them to be this stinky.
07 Chicago - Boring.
08 Real Salt Lake - They won 2 in a row at home. Not bad. Although I hear Mathis got into it with his own teammates the other night at the game ended. What is his deal. I bet they have medication for it.
09 Metrostars - So you get a whole slew of games at home to start the season and you can't win any of them, yet you go on the road and have two great wins. Huh? I really can't figure this team out.
10 Colorado - Ugh. PLAY JEFF CUNNINGHAM!!!!!
11 Chivas - Still playing like Goatboy from Saturday Night Live. They must be paying Ramon Ramierez a lot of money to keep his mouth shut about how bad this team really is.
12 Columbus - 4-0 losers at home! Does anyone go to these games anymore. I have said this before, but during their 18 game unbeaten streak last year I still didn't think they were any good.

ON TV SATURDAY:
Metrostars v New England at 3pm central time on ESPN2
DC United v Kansas City at 6:30pm central time on Fox Soccer Channel

Some News For You To Gnaw On

-Preston North End joins West Ham in the Championship League playoff final on May 30. The winner is promoted to the Premiership. The loser stays put. That is quite a big prize. Preston drew 0-0 with Derby, and won 2-0 on aggregate. Our Eddie Lewis has been a real driving force for Preston all year, and it would be cool to see him get a chance to go storming down the left wing torching Gary Neville next season.
-American youngster Danny Karbassiyoon confirmed to USSoccerUK via email that he has been released by Arsenal.
-Manchester City cut Steve McManaman loose from the team.
-Pablo Mastroeni has a thigh muscle injury and will not be playing for the USA next week against England. Kerry Zavagnin will take his spot. I love watching Pablo play.
-37,000 tickets have been sold for the USA-England match.
-At times of the season like now and in December, England is goes nuts with transfer rumors. It pains me at how dumb it all gets. But this one I just like the sound of (even though it holds no credence): Sunderland want giant striker Jan Koller as they step up to the Premiership. I love watching Jan Koller play for Borussia Dortmund in the Bundesliga. He really seems to have fun out there, and he looks somewhat elegant doing the job at 6'7". Thankfully he's not as geeky and awkward as that overrated lame-ass stringbean Peter Crouch (the Gheorghe Muresan of soccer.) By the way, Koller says he wants to stay at Dortmund, so what's the point.
-Even more Landycakes in USA Today. This time with his main squeeze and his two lil doggies.
-Colorado have let Mark Chung go so that he could sign with San Jose. Chung told Dylan Hernandez of the San Jose Mercury News that he wanted out of Denver, "I asked for it. I wasn't happy here."
-Frank Dell'apa has a huge expose on Clint Dempsey in today's Boston Globe. (4 web pages long!)
-In Mexico City, Club America took round one (of two) from Cruz Azul 3-1. Crybabeoc Blanco scored 2. The second leg of the MFL semifinal is Sunday. Tecos play Morelia on Saturday in the other semi.

I Nearly Forgot To Post Todays News

-Injuries are going to kill San Jose if there are any more. After losing two starting defenders to knee blowouts (Dayak & Weibel), they are now going to lose Brian Ching for proabably a month with a hamstring injury, and Brian Mullen for at least a month with a torn ligament in his ankle. Mullen will have to have surgery to repair the damage. Good luck guys, you are gonna need it.
-USA Today hosted a web chat with Landon Donovan. He answered many questions on what it is like to be the Landycakes.
-West Ham scored two away goals in putting down Ipswich (2-0, 4-2 aggregate) and will now move on to the Championship playoff final against the winner of tonites Preston v Derby match up. The final is in Wales at the Millenium Stadium on May 30.
-UEFA collects quotes from Russian & Portuguese newspapers after CSKA Moskova's big win in the UEFA Cup (3-1 over Sporting). This is the first time a Russian club has won a major European title.
-Tecos beat Morelia 1-0 in the MFL first leg semi final match up. Leg two is Saturday. The other side of the bracket has Cruz Azul v Club America playing tonite in their first leg.
-Both home teams won in MLS last night. Dallas 2-1 over Colorado & Salt Lake 2-0 over Chivas. The best observation that I can make about these games is that RSL beat both LA teams in the past 4 days. That's kinda cool.
-Another of my fave soccer writers is Ives Galarcep. He writes for the North Jersey Herald and ESPN. Today he writes in the Herald about former Celtic AND Rangers player Mo Johnston who is currently Bob Bradleys assistant with Metrostars.

Big Pimpin

I write for a web site called Blue Sky Soccer. It's basically a tomfoolery outlet & rumor mill for fans of the First Division team Minnesota Thunder. And it's a great frickin web site. My pal Demko has just posted two interviews he did there. The first is with semi-legendary coach Sigi Schmid & the second is with legendary USA player John Harkes. Read em and weep sucker:
-Sigi Schmid, Coach of the US Men's Under-20 National Team
-John Harkes, Assistant Coach of the US Men's Under-20 National Team

I Don't Know How Many Days In A Row It Has Rained Here, But People Are Looking For Ark's. So Here's Some News

-Each issue of Four Four Two magazine has a segment called My Perfect XI. Recently New England coach Steve Nicol picked his MLS inspired line up & urb26 over at bigsoccer.com was kind enough to post it for us. It's a great line up no doubt.
-PFC CSKA Moskva plays in Lisbon against Sporting Clube de Portugal tonite for the UEFA Cup title. CSKA features a 19 year old keeper - Igor Akinfeev, and twin brothers - Vassili and Aleksei Berezoutski - in defense. You can see the game live on Fox Soccer Channel at 1:30pm central time & repeated again at 7pm.
-Mark Van Bommel departure from PSV has him going to Barca on a free transfer.
-I hadn't seen this mentioned anywhere before: Mark Riley who hosts Morning Sedition on Air America is a huge fan of the Arse. Nick Webster of Fox Soccer Channel interviews him.
-The Patrick Kluivert experiment at Newcastle has ended in his release from the club.
-Derby must overcome a 2-0 hole to Preston and the surprisingly quick & energetic return of Eddie Lewis (from Appendix surgery!) Thursday night in the English Championship League playoff semifinals.
-In the other semifinal Ipswich brings a 2-2 draw home (and also those 2 glorious away goals) against West Ham tonite.
-Troy Dayak, San Jose muscle man, is out for the season with a torn ACL. He had already announced that he was going to retire after this season ended. So will this be it for him? Could be. I predict that SJ will not miss him, and as a matter of fact will flourish under younger defenders.
-I would love to see one of my favorite players, Superpippo Inzaghi get his chance for Milan in the Champions League final. He will have to beat out Crespo for the spot, but Superpippo is the man and can defenitely get the job done. If nothing else he will make one hell of a sub. I predict right now that he will win the game for them!!
-Two mid-week MLS games tonite: Real Salt Lake v Chivas USA & FC Dallas v Colorado
- 16 year old Real Salt Lake defensive midfielder Nic Besagno has been named Parade Magazine boys soccer player of the year. This is the top award in America for young players.
-All the latest rumors on Inter Milan via Football Italia. And there are a lot of them.
-USA U20's play Canada tonite in the Twin Cities hence the articles on Freddy in both the Minneapolis and St Paul papers today:
-Giving Adu His Due from St Paul Pioneer Press
-Freddy Adu: Juggling act from Minneapolis Star Tribune

The Stars Align With Great Articles By Great Writers

The high price of freedom
Rob Hughes
Arsenal cries foul to Chelsea
International Herald Tribune

A Homage To Catalonia
Phil Ball (of fire)
on Barca
Soccernet

Howard's Back In Net
Grant Wahl checks in with Tim Howard
American goalie talks about Man U & his new deal
Sports Illustrated

Marc Connolly interviews Simon Kuper
Marc Connolly of ESPN Soccernet
two of my very most biggest favoritist soccer writers team up for an article
US National Soccer Players Association

I Dream A Dream
Jimmy Conrad
wearer of red pants, and Kansas City centerback/poet laureate
Soccernet

Fill Yer Shoes With Soggy News

-As you may have heard yesterday, Richard Mulrooney of Dallas injured his knee in the match against his old team San Jose on Saturday. The worst has come true. Its a torn ACL in his right knee and he will me be out for about 6 months, meaning the rest of this season, and probably his chance of getting into the USA squad for World Cup Qualifiers.
-Dante Washington has signed a deal to play for Real Salt Lake.
-KC's Josh Wolff was named MLS Player of the Week. I thought it should have gone to Eddie Gaven, but I can't complain about Josh Wolff, as he is looking mighty dangerous out there. I can't wait to see Wolff in the Red, White and Blue again soon.
-I submitted my MLS All Star Ballot:
Goalkeeper
Joe Cannon - Colorado
Defenders
Tyrone Marshall - Galaxy
Michael Parkhurst - New England
Douglas Sequeira - Chivas USA
Midfielders
Clint Dempsey - New England
Landon Donovan - Galaxy
Shalrie Joseph - New England
Chris Klein - Kansas City
Richard Mulrooney - FC Dallas
Forwards
Pat Noonan - New England
Josh Wolff - Kansas City
-Former Liverpool and current Portsmouth midfielder Patrik Berger is going to sign a deal with Aston Villa
-Javi Zanetti, captain of my beloved Inter Milan is forming an even stronger bond with Subcommander Marcos and his Mexican Zapatistas. Last year Zanetti showed his support for the rebel group by sending a whole bunch of Inter gear and money out of his own pocket. Could you even imagine an American sports star openly supporting an anti-government organization in a foreign land? Zanetti's support has filtered through to the ownership and management of the club too. Sandhaanu News reports that there is now talk of a fund raising match. The first time I heard about this story was last fall when the Guardian ran this article.
-The other piece of Inter news, and actually bigger but no one wants to talk too much and jinx it, is that the team is one game away from claiming their first trophy since 1989. 1989!!! The Copa Italia will be theirs if they can capitalize on the 1-1 draw and the away goal they got last week in Cagliari. The final is tomorrow (Wednesday) at the San Siro in Milan. I am going to hold my breath, and cross my fingers and all that other stuff. NOTE: OK, I lied, this is only the semi finals. Roma plays in Udinese on Thursday in the other semi (1-1 first leg draw also), with the winners still to meet, I assume, sometime this decade.
-Mark van Bommel and Johann Vogel, two of PSV's most influential players are set to leave the team this summer. They were honored by the club and fans after last weekends final home game of the year.
-Eddie Pope says he is going to be called in to play for the USA after the England match, proving that Bruce Arena will call in more and some different players for the June 4 & 8 World Cup Qualifiers then he has named for the England match on May 28. 19 were called in for England, and 24 will be called in for WCQ.
-From Jack Bell in today's New York Times: Major League Soccer's marketing company, Soccer United Marketing, yesterday completed the acquisition of the name, logo, Web site and contracts of ChampionsWorld, a bankrupt outfit based in New Jersey that promoted North American tours of European clubs the past two summers. This gives MLS an even tighter bond with the big leagues of Europe.
-Jason Kries will be suspended from the next match for Real Salt Lake due to accumulation of yellow cards (3 in the last 3 matches).
ADDITION:
-Can you believe this one: Alexi Lalas suited up for San Jose Reserves on Sunday in their 2-1 win over Dallas. The team had so many injuries that they needed extra bodies to fill out the squad. Lalas played 36 minutes.

From A Proud Englishman

(words from a dear friend and reader Chuch)

As you will know the wonderful Mr Glazer is buying or has bought or is about to buy Man Utd…You will probably also know that fans, who seem to all hate him, gathered and marched round Old Trafford last night [Thursday] as they chanted things like "man utd not for sale" - a blindingly stupid thing to sing when you are a publicly limited company of course but perhaps the poor dears only ever got as far as the word pub in publicly limited...anyway they also displayed that innate talent for dumb humour that football fans do very well - For example: the massed ranks of Portsmouth signing [no matter who they are playing or what the score] "stand if you hate the scum, stand up if you hate the scum" [to the tune of go west by the pet shop boys] and "one man went to kill, went to kill a scummer" [scum is Southampton of course], anyway last night the fans sang this little ditty; "he's going to die, he's going to die, Malcolm Glazer is going to die, how I'll kill I don't know, cut him up from head to toe, all I know is glazer's going to die".... does not really scan and is not particularly funny other than how dumb and retarded it is and the fact that this is being sung by the fans of the club this dude has just sunk 300 million of his own cash plus a further 270 million of borrowings [which has gotta hurt balance wise] into and here are the fans not only not liking him or his investment but seeming to enjoy w/ a degree of relish the concept of slicing him from head to toe.....
Still makes me proud to be an Englishman!!

My Small Input On The Malcolm Glazer Story

I have been trying to avoid this whole Man U & Malcolm Glazer story. But I read an interesting tidbit in regards to NFL ownership. I was reading a story on the potential sale of the Minnesota Vikings football team. One of the suitors is a local business man named Glen Taylor. He is also the owner of the Minnesota Timberwolves NBA team. In the article it stated that Taylor (BTW he is second in line at a chance to buy the team) under current NFL bylaws would not be eligible to buy the football team, because the league prohibits its owners from being majority owners in other major sports franchises. So in order to buy the Vikings, Taylor would have to first sell the Timberwolves. After reading this, I suddenly thought of Glazers purchase of Man U and how that might be affected by the NFL protocols. Its a whole new territory of thought. Interesting.

International News Update In A Flash

-It looks like Dallas' Richard Mulrooney may have hurt his knee against San Jose on Saturday. The same with San Jose's Brian Ching in the same game. More word to come soon.
-Juventus have all but won Serie A for this year with a 2-0 win over Parma. The win widens the gap to 5 points as Milan appears to be putting all thought and effort on the Champions League final as they drew 2-2 with Lecce. Both teams have two more matches.
-I am not sure why either side wanted this deal, but Tim Howard signed a two year contract extension with Man U. I mean, good for him and all, but..... I just can't see the team not going out and trying to sign a big time keeper. Other signings: Ryan Giggs also signed an extension with Man U, and Tottenham signed Canadian Paul Stalteri from Werder Bremen.
-Barca won their first La Liga title since '99.
-After winning La Liga on Sunday with Barcelona, the man who escaped poverty with the money provided by Real Madrid, Samuel Eto'o, lead the 100,000 in attendance at the Nou Camp in a rousing rendition of "Madrid! Bastards! All hail the champions!" I have read that the Real Madrid fans are a little pissed off about it. Really?
-The MFL semi finals are all set: One will be a Mexico City derby starring Club America v Cruz Azul. With the second being Tecos v Morelia. (I really wish I could find some places to get good consistent stories about Mexican football - beyond scores and who got the goals etc.)
-According to AP, Thierry Henry will not play for Arsenal in the FA Cup final next Saturday against Man U. He had missed a bunch of games with a groin strain. Last week he came on as a sub against Everton to test it out, only to retweak an old achilles prolbem.
-Hansa Rostock was relegated from the Bundesliga. But not without a wild scene following the game.
-Kasey Keller again saved 'Gladbach's backbacon in a 0-0 draw to guarantee them a spot in the Bundesliga next year. They should give the dude the keys to the city for saving them in game after game. They would have gone down without him.
-FC Brugge won their 13th overall Belgian title on Sunday.
-How did I miss this one: Italy is going to play Serbia-Montenegro June 8 in Toronto & Ecuador June 11 at Giants Stadium.
-Here's the USA team that will line up against England on the 28th in Chicago. This is not the whole roster for the two World Cup Qualifiers on June 4 & 8.
-Rob Hughes of the International Herald Tribune gives us: With style and guile, Barça lifts Spanish crown.
-Middlesbrough signed forward Aiyegbeni Yakubu from Portsmouth.

Of The Four...

I honestly never gave West Bromwich Albion a chance to be the one to stay alive in the EPL (like a post nuclear cock-a-roach) (by beating Portsmouth), while the other three all choked on someone elses vomit. So I guess I must toast the Baggies, and send a farmer blow in the direction of the others. (Norwich got blasted 6-0 by a lousy Fulham team - lead by American Hero Brian McBrides two goals) (Crystal Palace drew with Charlton) (Southampton not surprisingly lost to Man U).
The BBC web site has a pretty cool little run down of the exact action from the relegation battle yesterday.
All four teams were still in danger and kicked off at exactly the same time, so here's how the next two hours see-sawed for all the teams involved:
-At Kick-off: NORWICH safely out of the bottom three in 17th place (Saints & Palace next, and WB in last)
-At 10 mins: SOUTHAMPTON safe, as they score and Norwich concede
-At 58 mins: WEST BROM safe, as they take lead against Pompey
-At 71 mins: CRYSTAL PALACE safe, as they go 2-1 in front at Charlton
-At 82 mins: WEST BROM safe, as Charlton level against Palace
-At Full-time: WEST BROM confirmed safe, as final whistle goes on 2-2 draw at The Valley for Palace.
West Brom get all 3 points, for a total of 34
Palace get 1, for a total of 33
Norwich & Saints get 0, for a total of 33 & 32 respectively

Planning Ahead

I was glancing at my future soccer viewing schedule and decided to check on the start time for the Panama v USA World Cup Qualifier on Wed June 8. Yes it will be shown on TV. But ESPN2 will delay the game so they can bring us 6 straight hours of Baseball Tonite from 7pm to 1am Eastern time. You did read that correctly. Then at 1am you will be seeing the match in full. That should draw some extraordinary ratings for the Sports Broadcasting Giant don't you think. I am so mad at the US Soccer Federation for allowing this bullshit to go on that I am boiling right now.

Watch 'Em If You Can

MLS this week (and on TV)

Sat May 14
New England v DC United 3pm central on ESPN2
Real Salt Lake v Los Angeles at 930pm on FSC
Columbus v Kansas City
Chicago v Metrostars
Colorado v Chivas
San Jose v Dallas

Wed May 18
Dallas v Colorado
Real Salt Lake v Chivas

Rankings & Reasonings for Friday May 13

Rank Number & Reason Why:
01 New England - Power. Grace. Skill. Luck. Fun. Class. Team. They are playing fantastic on both ends.
02 Los Angeles - The one thing they have in more quantity then any other team in the league is luck. But I have never felt luck was a fluke. You put yourself in a spot to take advantage of luck that comes your way. How many home games do they get to start the season though? Looked a little vulnerable in the back against toothless Colorado. Watch out for a fall from grace.
03 FC Dallas - They drew. But it was on the road, and they scored 3. Not bad at all. But only 4 points in the last 3 games. Is that the sign of greatness?
04 San Jose - Still not there. But being at #4 is pretty good for them. I am not convinced that Dom Kinnear is a good coach though. DeRo may have found an exciting home in the hole behind the front two. He looked great last week. Add him to Mullen, Ching, Davis, Cerritos & Moreno - thats offense.
05 Chicago – Confession: I have secretly always kinda hated them. I have liked many of their players, but I have a secret hatred for the city of Chicago in general. They have some interesting looking young attackers that I really hope bloom: Mapp, Herron, Barrett, Thiago, Rolfe.
06 DC United - Dema is back and so is Brain Namoff. Just in time to help save the defense, which will boost the offense. Look out league, here they come. Maybe.
07 Kansas City - I don't know what to say. Maybe they came into the season overconfident. Or perhaps ol' Coach Gansler is pacing them for the long haul. But they are scoring more, and giving up way more than we are used to seeing.
08 TIE: Chivas & Real Salt Lake & Colorado - The ugly triplets. The first two have a reason. Colorado does not. They need more Cunningham & Peguero like the rest of us need more cowbell. Bring it on. Chivas is looking better, RSL is looking worse.
11 Metrostars - I should never have given them so much credit last week. It was a fluke. They stink. They have no fire, passion, or drive. Who the hell is in charge? Mike Jeffries? No. Ivo Wortmann? No. Tim Hankinson? No. Octavio Zambrano? No. Lothar Osiander? No. Well they sure do play like teams coached by those bums.
12 Columbus - Give me a break. Who is letting this team bury it's head in the sand (or are they burying it in the crappy parking lots at CC Stadium). They should be in the top 3 or 4. Instead they are embarrassing. I never jumped on the "Fire Andrulis Now!" bandwagon before. I am on it now baby! And answer this question: why doen't Buddle & Razov seem to be working?

Hello Newslings

-In very exciting news, John O'Brien, the forgotten man of USA soccer has been added to the list of players coming into camp for the 2 World Cup Qualifiers in early June. I hope he sees some action on the field.
-In MFL quarterfinals first-leg action, Santos drew 2-2 at home to America and Necaxa played miserable at home losing 2-0 to Tecos. This puts America and Tecos in great position with the pair of away goals going into their home legs. (I am gonna get some more info on their whole playoffs and lay it out for ya.)
-Last month Fab Barthez was given a three month suspension for spitting at a referee. He appealed the decision, and came away with snake eyes. They not only didn't lower his suspension, but they added three more months to it! Nice work.
-Norman Hubbard has a hilarious look at the 10 WORST signings in England for the his past season. (Sadly, for Reading, Bobby Convey could almost be on that list.)
-Chelsea is being called bad names by Man U over supposed playground bully tactics, raising the rumor mongering up another notch. First Chelsea were said to go after players like Ashley Cole & Rio Ferdenand that are under contract to other teams, and now they are accused of going after youngsters who have already signed transfer deals with other teams. Oh, to be the scourge cuz you have money! (I think the last sentence of the article is also very interesting.) Look, I am not crying foul for the likes of Man U & the Arse, cuz they would do the exact same things if they could, I just think the whole thing is pretty lame for world soccer.
-The Beas wants to play dammit. DaMarcus Beasley is trying to get himself healthy to play against Willem II in the Amstel Cup final on May 29. This is great news.
-Something I find quite entertaining is the fact that the British newspapers print every stupid word that Sven Goren Erickson utters, but have failed to print a word of his interview saying that he thinks the USA will win the World Cup one day soon. Hmmmmmm.
-Now this kicks some ass. Gordon Strachan hands out his 04-05 Wee Gordan Awards. (Demko wants to know why a person would do an awards list for English football, but purposefully leave players from Chelsea, Arsenal, & Manchester United off the list of those eligible)
-The USA U20 team will be playing here in my towns, the Twin Cities, next Wednesday night in a warm up for the World Youth Championships against Canada. Here is the roster.
-Two foreign defenders have signed with the Metrostars. They are Danilo Aparecido da Silva from Brazil & Mamadou Ibrahima Diallo from Senegal. 21 year old left back Diallo comes over from Jeanne D'Arc in Senegal. Da Silva is an 18 year old center back from Ginasio Pinhalense de Esportes Atleticos.

Todays Blues News

-Congrats to Suprissa for taking their 3rd CONCACAF Champions Cup with a 3-2 aggregate win last night in Mexico City. UNAM Pumas actually won last nights match 2-1, but with Suprissa already holding a 2-0 lead from the first leg, it was theirs to win or lose.
-Cory Gibbs is finally back at training with Feyenoord, but will probably not play this weekend. Hopefully he is ready for Costa Rica on June 4!
-Craig Waibel blew out his knee in practice the other day. Its a bad one too, so his chances of returning this season are not good. He is a handsome man isn't he?
-The biggest news of the day for USA fans is that Eddie Lewis is going to startin training and get himself ready to play in the Championship's playoffs. Now that is really good news.
-England announced their roster for the two games in the US:
G: Scott Carson (Liverpool), Robert Green (Norwich), David James (Manchester City)
D: Sol Campbell (Arsenal), Ashley Cole (Arsenal), Wes Brown (Manchester United), Glen Johnson (Chelsea), Gary Neville (Manchester United), Phil Neville (Manchester United), Matthew Upson (Birmingham)
M: David Beckham (Real Madrid), Michael Carrick (Tottenham), Joe Cole (Chelsea), Stuart Downing (Middlesbrough), Owen Hargreaves (Bayern Munich), Jermaine Jenas (Newcastle), Shawn Wright-Phillips (Manchester City)
F: Peter Crouch (Southampton), Andy Johnson (Crystal Palace), Jermain Defoe (Tottenham), Michael Owen (Real Madrid), Alan Smith (Manchester United)
-I have been having a little chuckle over the people who are angry that England will not be fielding their toppermost of the poppermost squad on May 28 in Chicago. What did people expect. It's a friendly fer cryin out loud. Sure it would be cool to see the ultimate teams line up against each other. But both teams will save their best for June 4 & 8 when the games really count.
-Another player back on the field and working on recovering from injury is Barca's Henrik Larsson. He blew out his knee last fall, and is only in training to get himself ready for the start of next season.
-It's about frickin time. Man City finally gave the head coaches job to interim coach Stuart Pearce. He has led the team on a great charge since he took over the team two months ago. They floundered in Underachieverville the whole time Kevin Keegan was in charge. Now they are fighting for the last UEFA Cup spot.

This Is It For....

This an update to the EPL relegation post from a few days ago.
(see newly added reader notes below)

It's the last chance at glory for the bottom 4 teams in the EPL.
Who do you want to stay in the Premiership among the four teams battling for the last spot in the last week of the season?
Norwich 33 points (at Fulham)
Southampton 32 points (v Man U)
Crystal Palace 32 points (at Charlton)
West Brom 31 points (v Portsmouth)
(all matches on Sunday May 15)
One stays up & the other three go down.
Lemme know.....

Personally, I would prefer Norwich or CP, cuz they both play fun attacking soccer. Southampton just doesn't seem to have it, and West Brom plays that painful defensive crap. To make it worse, West Brom has several exciting attackers that their coach Brian Robson rarely puts on the field.
As an example, two weeks ago WB had Arsenal by the short and curly's late in the match at 0-0. West Brom had a chance to bring on three attackers to go for the jugular, but Robson stuck with his mudders. And of course the Arse got a game winner, so at around the 85th minute Robson puts his three gamers on the field together and they almost pull off the draw. Why were they not in the game 15 to 20 minutes earlier??? They deserve to go down just cuz of that.

votes so far:

Zathras said...
Gotta say it looks bad for Southampton.
Besides them, it'd be nice for both Norwich and Ipswich to be in the Premier League--I'm all for more heated derbies, and it's really a toss up between Palace and West Brom.
Kevin-- said...
Go Canaries!!! I definitely like the fact that they've battled back and more or less hold their fate in the hands.
Eric PZ said...
Please let it be the Budgie Filth from Norfolk going down.
added 5-12 at 2:21pm
Bill said...
Go eagles! I don't have a great reason, other than I went to a game at Selhurst Park in 2002. That's my only real connection to any of the four teams.
Plus, they try to play attractive football and I like Michael Hughes as a player. He tends to leave his heart on the pitch.

Same Old Formula Keeps Real Stories In The Shadows

My old buddy Steven Wells lays a precision guided groin shot to the "Hollywood Americana Sports Movie Machine" with his view on movies about sports made for a purely American audience (hence the insipid choice of a baseball remake for Fever Pitch).
He is absolutely correct when he says that, in Hollywood-logic, "You don't mess with a winning formula." (Barf!)
I think we American soccer fans should all consider ourselves lucky he only knows about "The Game Of Their Lives", but hasn't seen it yet.

Some Groovy News

-Trinidad & Tobago keeper Shaka Hislop has been released by Portsmouth
-How bad does MLS Wrap stink?
-Dema is back! Dema Kovalenko and Brian Namoff both played at the end of the match for DC United last week. They need them really bad to shore up that awful defense. Namoff was my unknown player of the year last year, and we all know that Dema can break a leg with the best of 'em.
-US Soccer UK says Claudio Reyna will not play for the USA in the two upcoming qualifiers. This weakens the midfield even more, but on the other hand, will give new guys a chance to show what they are made of.
-More players on the way out the door: Bayern Munich released Robert Kovac, Sammy Kuffour & Thomas Linke. And Edu is going to leave the Arse of his own free will. I think he is a really good player that will make some team very happy.
-T & T played their first friendly under new Dutch coach Leo Beenhakker, and even though they only played with the local members of the team (no one playing in MLS or Europe was available), they should never have been whooped 2-0 by a local team called North/East Stars. Isn't that kinda embarrassing.?
-Roberto Carlos, who has never been known to be a real brainiac, was seen after a match on Sunday to be giving his shirt to the leader of an Ultra Right Wing group who raise their support money by auctioning off players shirts. Nice move from a guy who says he abhors the racists. Hell, maybe he is afraid of them
-Wayne Rooney and Rio Ferdinand are now on the list of English players who will not be in Chicago for the May 28 match vs USA. Beckham, Owen, Gerrard, Carragher, Lampard, & Terry were already on that list.
-Tonite is the penultimate (change the previous word to FINAL please) match of the 2005 CONCACAF Champions Cup. Suprissa take a 2-0 lead to Mexico City (the Estadio Olímpico Universitario) and tries to win their 3rd Cup against the challengers Pumas UNAM. You can see the action live on Fox Soccer Channel at 8:30pm.
An anonymous soul dropped by to point out that penultimate means second to last, not last as I had used it. This means that once again, in trying to look like i can use words that have more that 5 or 6 letters, I have shown my true colors as a dumbass. Thanks for the correction. Your prize will be delivered asap. Oh, that's right, you signed it anonymously so you win NOTHING. But feel free to stop by and play again sometime.

Q & A With The Bruce

From USA Today today

Robbie Savage Is A Fool & Other News Of The Day

-Freddy Adu of DC United is the MLS Player Of The Week for week 6.
-Fulham's Liam Rosenior is the guy who has been getting playing time instead of our Carlos Bocanegra at left back. But Rosey got a red card in the last match, so will 'los get playing time in the final game of the season.? This should tell us something about the dudes future at Craven Cottage.
-Nick Sakiewicz "runs" the Metrostars, and he agreed to do an interview with a fansite connected to Matchnight. He pulls no real punches in his answers. But the interview goes a long way toward proving that he is an executive officer of Major League Dickwads (MLD). He is also really paranoid. And pompous. And delusional. He also shows that he does not care if his team wins or loses as long as they make money. Yes, he is one of THOSE people. Nick's an idiot.
-Things are so bad with crowd control in North Korea that they not only have been ordered to play their next World Cup Qualifier behind closed doors, but they have also been ordered to play the game in another (neutral) country. That's' pretty bad. Therefore, the next game, June 8, vs Japan will be played in Bangkok Thailand. A whole country full of idiots!
-Fernando Hierro, currently with Bolton, and a Real Madrid legend, is going to retire next week after the season ends.
-Another world class football fool, Francesco Totti, got suspended for 5 games by the Italian soccer governing board for punching a guy on another team during a match. Totti thought the punishment was too harsh, cuz it was only his 50th or 60th time getting suspended for his behavior, so he took the league to court. He lost. And he's an idiot.
-I have been seeing a lot of headlines this week about the Beach Soccer World Championships...... Oh, who fuckin cares! Seriously!
-Did you know that Diego Maradona was the new executive director of Boca Juniors?
-Did you also know that Robbie Savage is a fool? And an idiot?
-The Independent is another of the decent newspapers in England to read soccer stories from. Mainly cuz its not a tabloid. They have a really good story/diary written by an old veteran named Iwan Roberts describing the crazy season he just went thru. It's a great read. Diary Of A Footballing Nomad.
-I too am an idiot.
-Voting for this summers MLS All-Star Game starts today.

This Weeks Kuper & Ball

Simon Kuper: Stars saved from ultimate pitched battle

Phil Ball: Smallest Book In The World

The MLS Week 6 Table & Golden Boot List

The Table
Pts Team
16 New England
12 Los Angeles
11 FC Dallas
10 Chicago
09 San Jose
08 DC United
06 Kansas City
06 Columbus
05 MetroStars
05 Real Salt Lake
04 Colorado
04 Chivas USA

Golden Boot Leaders
Clint Dempsey 5
Landon Donovan 5
Brian Ching 4
Chris Klein 4
Eddie Johnson 4
Pat Noonan 4
Taylor Twellman 3
Ronald Cerritos 3
Carlos Ruiz 3
Edson Buddle 3

The News From Lake Nacogdoches

-How brilliant is Clint Dempsey? He reels in another one as The Rev beat Chicago for the 2nd time in 10 days with this unreal goal! The dude has become the Nacagdoces Superman with all these amazing winners. (Wait until the end of the clip for his latest post goal celebration! Last weeks theme was baseball, and this week it's fishing.)
-Tab Ramos on the plight of the Metrostars (from radio interview with Inside Soccer Radio): "The Metrostars organization is one in intensive care. That’'s the only way you can describe it. It’'s not just about playing and results. Teams can go 100 years without winning a championship. There are many of them all over the world. It’'s not winning a championship every few years. It'’s about you getting excited to go to the stadium. It'’s about you having an opportunity as a fan for someone to do something that makes you happy for that day. We have not found too many reasons to go back to the stadium."
-So Chris Klein wears the captains armband for KC this weekend, and what does he do with his leadership roll? He takes a blatant dive in the box and draws a PK. What an idiot. Nice example you set Mr El Capitan! Who does he think he is? Francesco Totti?
-This word has not been spread around much, but Cory Gibbs has a bad hamstring and has not played in two weeks for Feyenoord. That's all we need is another American hurt with less than a month to go before the next pair of Qualifiers. (Beasley & Lewis being the other two of course.) BTW - Feyenoord play at PSV next weekend.
-Wigan gained automatic promotion to the English Premier League by blasting Reading (not featuring Bobby Coney) out of the playoff race. Hello Wigan. Goodbye Reading.
-Lyon NOW have won the French League Un title. Finally. For the 4th consecutive season! Is France the new Scotland? The bad news for Lyon is that their coach, Paul Le Guen, has walked away from the team. I can only assume he has a very big spender on the other end of his phone line.
-Conor Casey's Mainz successfully avoided relegation and secured their spot in the Bundesliga for next year, even though Roy Makaay hit for a hattrick and Bayern beat them 4-2. The other American in Alemania named Kasey (Keller) is close saving his teams skin from relegation. Where would 'Gladbach be without Keller?
-Even though Super Pippo got a game for Milan after a nearly season long battle with injury, it was his team that suffered the real injury with a loss to now #1 Juve. The Old Lady still has something left in her gasatanka after all.
-EVERTON! Who would have put money on them making the Champions League before this season started? Amazing job, considering they sold their best player before the season started, and their second best player during the season. They got a lot of cash for those two, but they didn't run out and replace them. They just played with what they had. Every pundit on the planet figured them as a ripe candidate for relegation not Champions League. David Moyes will probably be named Manager Of The Year in England for the trick he pulled off. (Please shut up about Jose Marinho being MOTY. And while were at it, can somebody shut Jose up too.) Most people would have picked Liverpool, Newcastle, and maybe Middleborough to battle for that spot before the season started. They all choked on their own vomit, especially Newc.
-Chivas USA gets their first win. Only 10,000 showed up to see the game even though the team throws a big Cinco de Mayo bash. Did Coach Rongen save his job for another week by winning. I bet he did. The other question is, "What happens if they don't start drawing crowds to pay the bills?"
-Last week I forgot to mention that CSKA Moskova wrapped up Parma 3-0 at home to advance to the UEFA CUP title match. They are the first Russian team in over 30 years to reach any Euro title match. And in a total heartbreaker - Sporting Portugal scored 2 away goals to AZ Alkmaar's 1 to steal a 4-4 aggregate. The winner came at the very end of the 30 minutes of extra time. What an awful way to lose. So its May 18 and a lucky home game for Sporting Clube de Portugal against PFC CSKA Moskova as the match had already been set for Lisbon at the Estádio José Alvalade for the UEFA Cup Championship of 2005.
-Rob Hughes at the International Herald Tribune has a great story on a kid who is not Freddy Adu: Nurturing protégés in a sport where stars grow up fast
-And lastly, according to that pillar-of-beyond-reproach-reporting-and-London-fish-wrap The Sun, Gerry Houllier thinks UEFA should give Liverpool a Champions League spot for next year, even though they haven't earned it yet.

Rankings & Reasonings for Friday May 6

Rank Number & Why:
01 New England - Simply the best. On the road, at home, in the rain, blowout wins, close battles. They have it all. Again I will state that Avery John is this teams achilles right now. They better sort that out soon. The rest of the team is playing some amazing stuff right now.
02 Los Angeles - Great action on both ends of the field. They punk'd Dallas last week, when everyone thought it was going to be epic. One thing to remember, they are doing all this damage during a long home stand at the best home stadium in MLS. Sorry DC.
03 FC Dallas - The mighty bite the dust. Go to LA for a war, and come home bloody. They have 27 more games to sort it out though. No fears.
04 Chicago – Hangin' in there. Get stomped at home by the league leaders, then go on the road to 'lumbus and teach them a lesson. Good job men in red. They have some really exciting young players on this team.
05 San Jose - Um. Why did they trade Steve Cronin to LA? This will come back to haunt them, as Pat Onstad is looking ancient. They don't seem to miss Landycakes up front. I think their true problem is in the coaches box though.
06 Kansas City - More ugly Gansler ball. Come on Bob, release the hounds! You have 'em. Now use 'em. This bunker ball will kill me if you keep playing it. Or I just won't watch.
07 DC United - They have to get it together some time soon, don't they? Well I guess nothing is ever for sure. But this team has way too much offense to be playing boring soccer like this. At least they didn't allow any goals on the road.
08 Metrostars - You win on the road, and score 3 against Joe Cannon and you leap off the bottom of the pile. Did anyone really think they were that bad?
09 Real Salt Lake - Another tie aint so bad for this team, especially against an offense like San Jose. The problem I am starting to see though is that the starting 11 average age is almost 45.
10 Colorado - Weren't they the team that was going to set a new standard for defensive quality? They let a lifeless Mets come to Denver and slap 3 on 'em. Then they put Jeff Cunningham in the game at the last minute and he scores again. I think he has played about ten minutes so far this season and he has 2 goals. Get that dude on the field now!
11 Columbus - What a stink bomb they are. No spirit, no fight, no excitement, no will. NO MAS! Gracias.
12 Chivas - Well, at least they weren't a sieve last week. Only gave up one. But to achieve that they had to play 9 men back all game. This team is in trouble, unless more guys step up and get serious.

To All My Friends...

I have no idea if you enjoy my crappy blathering or not, but I enjoy writing it. Justified!
Its even more gratifying to know there are other freaks just like myself here in the good old USA.
Below are some excellent weblogs dedicated to the beautiful game.
Reading them religiously is a must if you want me to take your love of the game seriously.

...off the post!

We Call it SOCCER (also thanks to the brood at WCIS for showing me how to use my "comments" section properly)

FOOTBALLS ARE ROUND!

Ramblings of a Soccer Junky

Soccer Fever

Soccer Thoughts

Now go buy yourself some bubblegum.

Chew On The News

-Is it over for Carlos Bocanegra at Fulham. It sure is starting to seem like it. He has not played in at least a month, and when Fulham boss Chris Coleman talked about the man (Liam Rosenior) in Los's spot he said this: "....overall he has been a big plus for us this season. He has come on the scene aged only 20 and he is a kid. He has played out of position on the left hand side but I think he has done terrific." So, yeah. Carlos better find a new home cuz he has been beat out by a guy who doesn't even play the spot.
-Not surprisingly, Clint Dempsey was named MLS Player Of The Month for April. He is tied with Brian Ching for tips in the league in scoring with 4 goals and his team has 13 points from 5 matches to lead MLS.
-Today in the UEFA Cup semifinal second legs its CSKA Moskova v Parma (first leg 0-0) & AZ Alkmaar v Sporting Portugal (first leg 1-2). No one has the advantage in the first match, but Alkmaar has that magical away goal in their pocket from the first legs.
-Last night Saprissa downed Pumas UNAM 2-0 in the first leg of the CONCACAF Champions Cup final in San Jose, Costa Rica. The deciding leg takes place Wed May 11 in Mexico City at the Estadio Olímpico Universitario. Saprissa won the title in 93 & 95, while Pumas have won the title in 80, 82 & 89. Last years champion was Alajuelense of Costa Rica.
-The coach of the Australian national team has to undergo anger management counseling after being found guilty of verbally abusing a reporter. Bummer dude.
-Soccer 365's grizzled uncle and unfortunately named Don Cuddy has a Q & A with first year sensation Michael Parkhurst of the Revs.
-Poor lil Francesco Totti starts his 5 match ban for beating on a Sienna defender. He is sorry about the incident. Awwww.
-LA Galaxy will take on J-League champs Yokohama F. Marinos in the 2005 Yokohama World Challenge on Wed June 8 at the Home Depot Center
-I wrote about it last week, so ESPN steals my schtick for a column this week. Bitches.

Hail Milano (Even Though I Hate To Say It)

You have to give it up to Milan for the huge victory yesterday in the Champions League semi. Even though the were totally outplayed by PSV over the second half of leg one and the entirety of leg two yesterday, they still gave you that impression all along that they were going to find a way to get that one away goal to seal their fate. And of course they did. Its a damn shame for PSV cuz they gave it every thing they had, and they are so much fun to watch. Now we might be subject to a snooze-fest for the final from Atatürk Olympic stadium in Instalbul on May 25. Liverpool v Milan - two teams who got to this point by playing the absolute minimum of offense. The edge has to go to Milan though, cuz of Shevchenko!

Cock-a-doodle News

-Metrostars won their reserve league match 3-2 over Colorado on Sunday. But the real news was the fact that Jonny Walker was in the nets the last 45 minutes for the first time since the end of last season when he had shoulder surgery. They are going to need his leadership if they want to stand a chance of being any good.
-It was really hard not to let out a loud cheer in the office when Liverpool did it! 1-0 over Chelsea and they are on to the Champions League final against tomorrows winner of PSV (0) & Milan (2).
-Kansas City midfielder, and team captain, Diego Gutierrez injured his knee cap last Saturday and will miss two months.
-Wanna know how much the big boyz are getting paid to play the beautiful game. Soccer America has a list of the 20 highest paid players in the world as gathered by France Football (the same people who award the world player of the year).
-A rich dude from New York is in the market for a MLS team. Will he get a new team? Will he buy one that exists? The Kansas City Star has him connected to that towns pathetically supported squad.
-Pablo Mastroeni of Colorado has been suspended for 2 games after a cheap shot he laid on Metrostars youngster Abbe Ibrahim. He will miss the game this weekend at Los Angeles and a home game a week later against Chivas. If you watch the video you can barely see it happen cuz the camera is too far away, but the commentators (I am pretty sure its JP Dellacamera & Shep Messing) talk about it, and say that Pablo deserved a red card, while the referee calls nothing. Then Messing says that the league should look at the video after the match, and give Mastroeni a fine and suspension, which is exactly what happened. Good call Sheppy.

Newsy Quibblings

-Amado Guevara from the Metrostars was named MLS Player of the Week for Week 5. He lead his team to a much needed 3-0 victory by scoring a mean hat trick in Colorado against the leagues best keeper Joe Cannon.
-Will anyone decent suit up for England when they take on the mighty mighty USA on May 28 in Chicago? So far Owen, Beckham, Lampard, and Terry are all out.
-Coca-Cola English League Championship season is coming to a close this weekend. The top 2 teams get direct promotion into the Premiership, while the next 4 go through a playoff for the last spot.
Here's where we sit as of today:
Sunderland 91 points - already secured automatic promotion to the Prem as #1
Wigan and Ipswich tied at 84 - one will go up automatically as #2 finisher, while the other will be in the playoff for the final spot
Preston 75 - clinched a spot in the playoff
Derby 73 - fighting for playoff spot
West Ham and Reading tied at 70 - fighting for playoff spot
Sheffield United 67 - still with a chance for a playoff spot
And here are the games for the final week of the regular season: (all games kick off at the same time on Sunday May 8)
Wigan at home with Reading
Ipswich away to Brighton
Preston away to Derby
Derby at home with Preston
West Ham away to Watford
Reading away to Wigan
Sheffield United away to Wolverhampton
In playoff it will be:
3 v 6
4 v 5
Then the winner of 3-6 plays the winner of 4-5
Last team standing goes up to the Premiership

Ball y Jonesy

Two articles for you to read (mandatory):
From Los Angeles Times - Klinsmann Still Makes Everything Look Easy by Grahame L. Jones
and
From Soccernet - Morbo From Afar by Phil Ball

Run DMB Could Be Out For A While

Yanks Abroad is reporting that DaMarcus Beasley could miss 3-5 weeks from an injury he suffered during an Eredivisie match last Friday. I saw this photo of some big freak trying to snap the boyz leg in half as posted by bluedaddy19 on bigsoccer.com. Later on, johan derksen posted this GIF, also on bigsoccer.com. It's gruesome (you've been warned). Luckily he only sustained a knee strain, cuz it sure looked a lot worse. This could mean he will not play the rest of the season for PSV, and also miss the next two USA World Cup Qualifiers, at home to Costa Rica on June 4 and away to Panama on June 8.

Monday Mornings Splendiforous News Bits

-My beloved team, the Minnesota Thunder, kicked off their 2005 season with a draw in Portland on Friday night
-A huge congrats go out to Chelsea for dominatingly won the EPL. An unlimited budget, a couple of homegrown stars, and great manager all add up to them being nearly unstoppable this season. Frank Lampard scored 2 in the match to clinch the title. His first goal came only a few minutes after he took a shot "south of the border" and appeared to be in considerable pain (natch!) His second was on a lovely counter attack breakaway to seal it up. Their keeper, Peter Cech, was awesome this season. So was John Terry. Again, congratulations to Chelsea.
-And Lyon wrapped up the French title this past weekend as well. 4 in a row for them!! CORRECTION: Bill tipped us off to the fact that Lyon did not wrap it up yet. They can this coming weekend, which would make it 4 in a row. Thanks Bill.
-In MLS, Clint Dempsey did it again for New England as they tipped a much improved defensive Chivas 1-0. LA proved that they are more real than FC Dallas right now, kicking their asses 3-0 at the HDC. KC & DC played to an ugly 0-0 draw - blechhhhhhh. Chicago mopped up on the Crew 2-0 in Columbus. San Jose came from behind to draw 2-2 in Salt Lake City. And Metrostars bitch-slapped Colorado 3-1 in the Mile High City.