Sunday, October 03, 2010

It’s Nut Cuttin’ Time!

My goal this Sunday is to run the phrase “Nut Cuttin’ Time” into the ground.

Sitting in my cubicle, calm and collected, feeling that gotta get mine perspective, I turned to my co-worker and announced that I was feeling such a sentiment and that my work life was getting pretty crazy with a ton of projects and launches all due out at the same time.

He nodded calmly and said, “It’s nut cuttin’ time huh?”

“Sure is.”

I turned back to my computer and pondered the colloquialism. Nut cuttin’ time. Hmm. Something to do with gathering nuts so I wouldn’t be like the greedy grasshopper starved when the winter came?

“What does nut cuttin’ time mean? Like acorns or animals?”

“You’ve never heard that? You’re from Kansas, you’ve never done any nut cuttin’?”

“You mean when they castrate bulls?”

“Yah, nut cuttin’. You’ve seriously never done that before? You’re from Kansas, I thought we all had.”

I laughed.

I imagine that nut cuttin’ is one of those skills that those fancy big city folk in New York City think all Kansas citizens have.

In honor of the phrase, “It’s Nut Cuttin’ Time” I presented a wrap up of this weekend’s action and playoff hopes.

I also urge you not to do a Google image search that relates to the phrase or subject in any way.

Who’s Did The Cuttin’
The Whole Western Conference
Damn whole Western Conference, you scary! How come all the nut cuttin’ teams are in one division? No one who is struggling to make the playoffs right now wants anything to do with you (unless they are playing Chivas USA).

FC Dallas
At the top of the cuttin’ pack, FC Dallas stands proud with a bag full of nuts. Last week they took a hacksaw to Kansas City, and this week they take out the clippers and go at Chicago. With 18 games played without a loss, FC Dallas is not a team anyone on the verge of the playoffs wants to face.

Real Salt Lake
RSL is another team posed to constantly cut nuts. Even when they were outplayed by New England, decisive finishing when it matters means Real Salt Lake gave New England a nice nut cuttin’ job.

NY Red Bulls
KC lost to FC Dallas at home last week and NY pretty much did KC in as they braved a storm of 26 shots from KC to win 1-0. Yup, KC’s nuts are cut. And best of all for NY, they qualified for the playoffs by winning.

Seattle stepped up big and cut up Toronto with a hard to get come from behind win. Toronto’s playoff hopes are done. Nuts cut by another playoff contender.

Who’s Got Cut
The Whole Eastern Conference
Damn Eastern Conference, you’re not scary at all! Only the second place team in the East, Columbus, can get past 6th place in the west if you moved them all into one conference. Lots o’ nuts been cut.

Who’s Already Been Cut
And then there is that sad infertile club who long who never even made it to the cuttin' chute.

DC United
Cut since before the season began. Maybe they can regain their former glory next year.

Graham’s Nut Cuttin’ Post Season Prediction
No one in the Eastern Conference but the top two teams will make the playoffs.


You can yell at Graham for tying Nut Cuttin Time, a phrase which should not be used in polite company @ or


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